Arguably the best argument ever argued!

I think, perhaps, Rod quite literally lives to argue.  To correct.  To advance himself.  Of course, it never works, and in the process, he just makes an ass out of himself, but like I said... I think he lives for it.

On a call with a customer:  "Well, it's cloudy and grey here...[it was actually sunny] What's the weather like there in Toronto?"  A long period of silence passed.  Then the customer said, "Um, who's in Toronto?"  Rod reminded him.  "YOU are!"  "No, I'm in Wisconsin."  Rod argued. "No, you are in Ontario! That's in Toronto, right?"  Wrong again, Rod.  Toronto is in Ontario. But close!  And I think the customer likely knows where he is located... So I'm gonna go out on a limb and say Rod 0, Customer 2.  Criminy!  He is just so embarrassing!
 
I was in a Microsoft training course - a good one - about troubleshooting upgrade issues when people start migrating from Office 2007 to 2010.  I put it in the calendar, and since I never have had to tell Rod in the past of training sessions, I left it at that.  Rod came up wanted to have a meeting right as the course was starting.  By now, I'm sure you know that all meetings turn into arguments, they are never really "meetings," and we rarely discuss the issue that prompted the meeting.  I told him "I'm in a training class."  "What do you MEAN, TRAINING class?!"  I ignored him - I was still trying to get the connection working, and I didn't stutter - my words were self-explanatory.  Let him figure it out on his lonesome!  Besides, he just wanted another argument and I wasn't in the mood.  I could hear him clicking around - presumably at the calendar - while he muttered and murmured.  Then, "What is this 'Em - Ess' Training thing?"  I ignored him again.  Then, bellowed, "KATIE!  WHAT IS THIS 'EM ESS' TRAINING THING?!"  I played dumb.  "I'm sorry, what?  I'm in a training class, I couldn't hear you."  "WHAT IS THIS EM ESS THING?"  The emphasis he was placing on the letters MS made it clear he didn't understand what "em ess" stood for.  So... I helped him.  I regretted it almost instantly. "It is a Microsoft Training course."  "TRAINING YOU ON WHAT!!!"  "Troubleshooting applications!"  Now, I know that in reality, the least helpful thing I said was that last sentence, but it pacified him.  And I also know I was playing hard to get - I didn't want to tell him what the course was about, so I compromised with a half-explanation.  I'm not sure why.  I think I'm just starting to enjoy how easy it is to wind him up.  I think it's the Irish in me. Anyway, not long thereafter, Jen said, "Katie?"  To which Rod very snidely replied, "She is BUSY for the next TWO HOURS!"  Whatever.  Go suck a rubberband or something else more useful than your harassment.

So while I was in the training course, the main debt collector called again.  Because I was in my class and Jen was on the phone, Rod had to take his own collection call.  Finally!  Jen and I have been fielding these calls for, I dunno, two months?  Jen, how long?  Anyway, I couldn't hear everything, but I could clearly hear this line:  "I am not prePAREd to make a payment!"  He sounded like a 4 year old boy, hands on hips, stomping his feet.  And then, "Contact me only by email, then!!"  His voice lowered, so I had to ignore the class for a minute.  After all, a blogger has certain responsibilities to her adoring public!  "You are harassing me!  I can't believe I have to send a letter to stop this harassment.  But fine I will thanks goodbye."  All one sentence.  Might have been one word for as quickly as he said it!

As the second hour of my training began, Rod decided to try meeting with me again.  "Can we have a meeting?"  Sigh.  "Rod, remember? I'm in training."  My voice was plaintive. His face sneered at me and at the idea that I was in a training course.  The nerve!  Really.  Why wouldn't he just go away?  This really was important.  I wasn't faking it.  (Maybe he's not used to that from a woman?) (Oh SNAP)  But no.  He started talking, regardless of the headphones in my ears.  Regardless of the Power Point slides moving on my screen.  He said, "FINE! I want you to do ONE THING.  And it BETTER be done toMORrow."  "Ok, Rod, make it quick.  What is it?"  I removed the headphone from my left ear.  Well, crap.  That just opened the door for him.  Consider that a lesson learned!  "Well, FIRST!  I want you to..." And here, he proceeded to talk about things that not only had we spoken about, but that had already been established in email!  So I interrupted him.  My class was still droning on in my right ear and I wanted to get back to it quickly.  I asked him, "In light of expediency, could you be less repetitious, please?"  Well, that just pissed him off.  I could tell.  Part of me grinned on the inside. That was easy!  "I will SAY whatever I WANT to say, Goddammit!"  Well, crap.  There he went, cussin again.  Now I had to decide... stay for the important class?  Or leave on principle?  I stayed. So I said right back: "Well, then, I will just choose to ignore you... and your cursing! This time."  I turned my back on him quite deliberately and put my headphones back in.  It was at this point that he stammered through a tongue thickened by hate and anger, "Well, consider this HOUR as YOUR time and TIME you will not be PAID for."  Really?  Now he's threatening my salary for doing what is in my job description?  I mean, I get the whole "He's the boss of me" thing, but... really?  "Okay, Rod, go ahead.  This is important.  More important than money."  Well, he just kept going.  He was on a roll!  "I mean, I'm not going to pay for this BULLSHIT!"  I replied quietly (I think), "Fine, Rod, consider me out of the office now.  I'll be quiet, you be quiet.  If you can't keep a clean tongue in your mouth, I don't need to be paid for the hour."  You know?  Really, at this point, I swear I wasn't trying to egg him on anymore.  I was just missing more of my class.  He was storming around the office now, I heard him whip around the corner as he said something to the effect that he paid my salary so he had the right to speak however he wanted.  I pointed out that ... actually? he wasn't paying me anything right now, so ... I let the logic wash over him.  He got really silent very quickly.

Rod confuses words.  A lot.  But he'll argue till he's blue in the face about it!  For instance, has been having problems with his PIN at the bank.  Apparently, it will work at the bank, and then when he gets to his computer, the password stops working.  Now, I have been silently laughing about this one to myself for probably 2 months now.  Obviously, he is trying to use his ATM PIN as his bank website logon password.  Then he blows out his web logon by typing it in wrong 3 times.  If his bank is like mine, it means not only is he locked out for 24 hours from the website, but he now also has to call the bank and get his web logon password reset and emailed to him.  Then he'll be able to logon to his web page for a while, and then, oddly enough, his ATM PIN will stop working - because he's using his new password!  So, in the last 2 months or so, he has had, I think, 4 PINs mailed to him and has called the bank 5 or more times to get his password reset.  He thinks they are the same thing, used for both purposes.  I feel like I am typing in circles.  Does this make sense?  Finally, today, I heard him on yet another call.  "Ohhhhh.  So, I have to have TWO DIFFERENT PASSWORDS?  They are DIFFERENT?"  I won't bore you with his opinion of having to memorize two passwords to do "the same thing," but suffice it to say, the poor person "helping" Rod got a tongue lashing.

Rod confuses other words as well.  Insulation/Installation.  Sure, practically the same thing.  Others I think I've mentioned, console/counsel.  As in, he sends people to look in the admin counsel all the time. If he asks me to deinstall something one more time... And now the latest.  "Katie, do you think you are competent enough to do this install?"  Oh brother.  I just rolled my eyes.  Confident.  He wants to know if I am confident about doing the install.  When I told him later it was insulting to ask if I was competent enough to  do something, he said he never said that.  I just said ok.  Like pimples, some fights just aren't worth the time it takes to pick at.

So aside from digging up many, many skeletons about Rod lately, today was highly entertaining.  As I uncover clear details about the level of his corruption, I hope to post them here.

Of course, I might just be too embarrassed to admit to what I find...


Eye Tee Girl