Call on Line 1!

I think I've said it before, but Rod is #1.  Especially (only?) in his book.  Early this morning, he wanted me to print out my scheduled call report.  Now, considering I have no calls scheduled, this seemed like an exercise in futility, but wherever Rod is, there are bound to be exercises in futility.  So, despite the fact that I know how to run this report, Rod has to touch my screen (Ick Factor +1) to point to the various icons.  Despite the fact I only started a few weeks ago, Rod makes me enter 01.01.04 as the "start" date.  Despite the fact that nothing shows up on the report except training sessions (from the past) (that never happened), Rod has me print it out.  Lovely.  He was muttering something about never knowing what you might find as he was forcing me to print.  Somehow, I felt violated.  And guilty for the trees I visualized falling, one by one, as the printer greedily sucked up one white page after another.  Although, I guess I should feel somewhat better, seeing as though I am now allowed to recycle.

Apparently, Rod really likes phone line #1.  In the middle of a call, Rod blurts out so loudly, I can hear it through my headphone "HEY WHO IS ON LINE 1!?" and when informed that a customer had called in for help, waited perhaps 60 seconds. Then: "Are you JUST ABOUT DONE WITH THAT GUY?!  I NEED MY AUTO DIALER!"  Despite the fact that we were in the middle of helping a customer, Rod was apparently unable (or unwilling) to dial numbers by hand.  And I know the customer could hear the cranky question.  So Dave and I  quickly got off the line and called him back on line 2.  Whew! Dialing imposition averted!  Sometimes, all I can do is shake my head at this man.

Rod finds it difficult to stay on task.  Here is a conversation he had with Jennifer:
     "So... List FIVE things that um.... [20 seconds of silence, I timed it]... So we have to SUMMARIZE what we KNOOOOWWW... So what you have to DOOOO [silence] is OPEN this DOCUMENNNNT [silence] but what I'm interested in is what you're going to SAYYYY in the FIRST PARAgraph..."
    Now, let me ask you, if Rod had said that to you, would you have any idea what he was asking you to do?  List five things?  Summarize?  Write a paragraph?  And he never mentioned a topic for any of those writing styles.  I think Jennifer has a tough task in front of her today.  Oh, well, the good news is, he'll likely forget he asked her to do anything at all by noon today. 

When Rod gets bored, all attention must focus on him, and all activities must cease until he is once again entertained.  For instance, back to that same call.  Rod started in with Jennifer.  "Hey, did you get my email about XYZ?" "Yes, I did."  "Well, could you REPLY PLEASE!"  (He said please in a way that didn't mean please in the least.) She let him know that she was trying to note the sales calls she was going to make for the day.  She politely queried him: "Should I stop doing this, then, to reply to your email?"  Or there was the time, on the same call, when Rod asked me what a customer needs to do to perform an upgrade.  Because I was on the call, I made a mistake in thinking I could give Rod a short, simple answer.  "He needs to back up his database"  This was not good enough.  I was then told by Rod "WELLLL, I don't underSTAND, if he doesn't have write access to SQL, how will he DO this..."  I tried one more time (the perpetual optimist, I suppose)  "All he has to do is make a copy of the file" still wasn't good enough.  By now, Rod was yelling in his frustration about SQL access and his own confusion, so I reminded him I was on the phone and told him I would help him when I was off the call.  Rod muttered crankily, but at least he got quiet and settled down after that. 

At some point, I hope Rod realizes that just because he doesn't understand something does not mean those around him are muddled in the same quagmire of confusion.  But not just yet... I have more stories left to tell...

I'll be back tomorrow with more tales from the dark side!

Eye Tee Girl