It's all about him...

Rod goes swimming at 10 or 11.  He is often gone for 2 or more hours. This period of time is usually our most productive, because we don't have Rod interrupting us every 10-15 minutes.  Upon his return, Jennifer and I are usually very hungry and very ready for lunch.  Rod is very sated and very rested, and ready to put us to work.  Rod is almost always shocked when he starts working us, and someone says "I really need to eat now."  Do you suppose the world really just revolves around him? Or does he think we just don't need rest and nourishment?

As I've mentioned before, Rod is kinda just creepy.  I'd describe him in detail, but I really don't want people figuring out who he is.  It's not like he's famous or anything, but a girl's gotta play it safe.  Suffice it to say he really is like the pointy haired boss, complete with curly, unkempt hairs everywhere.

The curly hairs generally collect and form triangles pointing in three different directions: Up, left, and right.  Sorta like Bozo the Clown only with a tuft on top, too:

But curly.  And grey.  And unkempt.  Did I mention that already?  Ick factor +1.

In reviewing the picture of pointy haired boss, I realize that Rod is nowhere near that well dressed.  His clothes are always soiled, and almost always, he has a large food stain (2 or more inches) in the center of his shirt.  Even first thing in the morning! Ick factor +2.

On Friday, Rod told Jennifer and me that he had a treat for us. This made both of us cringe and wonder what on earth was in store for us. Just before he left for the day (1:45), he brought out some glow stick bracelets. Now, these are cool, and I was kinda impressed. But then I noticed Rod was reaching for my hand and I was dodging him. Finally he snatched my other hand quite trickily, and I was trapped. Once he was holding my hand, he then placed the bracelet around my wrist for me, and then even patted the back of my hand.  Almost in a caress. Ugh. Ick factor +3.

Jennifer came in this morning with bad news.  Unfortunately, someone hit the side of her car and broke her passenger side mirror!  Rod immediately said to her "That's because you are so hot looking.... Hanging out at all those night spots!" Someone really needs to enroll this man in sexual harrassment classes.  Or sensitivity training.  Or "Becoming Human 101"... ANYTHING!  He really has no clue that what he says and does is hugely inappropriate, does he?  None, zero, zilch, nada.  Ick factor +3.

Today, we lost power in our building for probably close to 2 hours.  Being in a darkened room with Rod made me shudder, but then I had to stand next to him while he went over my to-do list with me to explain what each item meant.  In detail.  On a to-do list that *I* wrote.  I think I know what I meant by each item, thanks. It made me wonder exactly what his purpose was in standing close to me in the dark. Ick factor +2.

In light of the power outage, we couldn't work on our computers.  Rod decided we needed to have Jennifer pitch me our products.  Only he didn't let her finish many sentences, and instead interjected his own opinions, or (our favorite) he tried to come up with "pop quiz" type questions that tested our knowledge on anything from accounting practices ("What is a budget?" or "What is a general ledger?") to various types of licensing rules.  (I still have no idea what those questions had to do with the software I was trying to learn.  We just went along with it.)  During this conversation, I took some notes on words that Rod has trouble with:
   1.  Rod installs and DE-installs applications.
  2.  He says "queeery" instead of "query"
  3.  When he is talking about a LAN, he refers to it as a LAND.
  4.  He uses the word "Knock-off" instead of "challenge" as in the following pop quiz question: "What are the knock-offs to selling this product?"

Today, when the power was restored, Rod decided it was time to recycle.  I was told the importance of recycling, and what it means to recycle.  Apparently, you can re-use paper you no longer need!  You don't have to throw it away!  You just collect it up into a box that says "Recycle here"  I suppose this means I now have permission to use the recycle bin, in addition to the garbage and refrigerator privileges I was granted a week ago.  I'm moving up in the world!

Well, I hope you are more thankful than ever to be working wherever you are working instead of here.  And more than that, I hope you got a laugh today. 

Total ick factor today: +11

Eye Tee Girl